pack animal existance

WWJD? Darned if I know!

2011-10-17T21:57:00.001-07:00

I write this as a Christian who is simply pondering the aspects of his faith and teachings. I'm not losing my faith or questioning the spiritual belief in God, just trying to figure out how I best fit into it, I imagine.

Hmmmm, sometimes I wonder if the church hasn't almost done itself a disservice by the way they promote Jesus. I mean, when I was growing up the phrase "What Would Jesus Do?" was pushed on us to be our motto. WWJD became a HUGE thing in the Church. (I'm sure we can all get sidetracked here on a discussion about mass commercialization of the church, however, that's not really my focus. Lets assume that their was a genuine message behind the mass commercialization and a hope that those guidelines would truly help the struggling Christian.)

(Okay, are we back? Awesome!) The problem that I find is that I have a hard time relating to Jesus. I mean, He's portrayed as the Superman of the Bible. He never sins, he can see a person's sins and life story just by looking at them, he can feed 5,000 people with 2 loaves of bread and 5 fish (or was it 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish...anyway). I've got....a good gift for puns and I'm decent with slapstick comedy. Those are my "Super-Powers." I can't see into people's souls; I'm not even a good judge of character. I'm way too trusting and always assume the best of people.

This comes into play usually whenever I'm confronted with a needy homeless guy on the street asking for money. The mental conversation goes like this.

Me, thinking: Hmmmm....this nomad is asking me for money, what should I do?
Other voice in my head, conscience, maybe?: Ah, so its the classic morale dilemma. Do you save your hard-earned money for yourself or do you give some to this gentleman in need?
Me: I'm not sure. Hmmmm...what's the right thing to do here?
Other voice Well, you have always been told to ask yourself "What Would Jesus Do in this situation?" Well, what do you think Jesus would do?
Me: He would be able to see this man's soul and know if he was truly in need of money for food or if he was goign to spend it on drugs or alcohol, or even if he wasn't truly needy at all. He would then know just the right thing to say in order to turn this man's life around and renew his spirit.
Other voice Ummmm...yeah, you can't do that.
Me nope.
other voice: Hmmmm...drive him to McDonald's and buy him a filet-o-fish! That'll get him food and you know exactly where your money went. Pick yourself up one, too. You're hungry.
(See what I mean about being too trusting. In any case, I did drive him to McDonald's and get him a Filet-O-Fish and also a 5 dollar gift card so he could have breakfast tomorrow. He did not kill me, steal my car, or anything in my car, so I guess being too trusting isn't always a bad thing. Also, my Filet-O-Fish was delicious. )

However, you can see where "WWJD" didn't really apply to my situation. I had the same trouble in High School. I was always taught that masturbation was a sin and lusting in general is a very bad thing. (Again, take the time, if you need to, to rant about "oppressing sexuality" or other gripes against the way the church handles such issues. Take your time, I'll wait. Got it out of your system? Okay cool.) So since I was in my teens and beset with a great desire for all things "rutting," I was struggling with vast temptation.

Me: GAH! I'm so shocking horny! Gotta be strong, what would Jesus do in this situation? How did He handle it?
Other voice: Jesus wouldn't give in to temptation. He never sinned. He simply resisted the urges.
Me; What...really? How'd He do that? What's His secret? I'm getting turned on reading Archie and Veronica over here! Its killing me.
Other voice: He's Jesus. He's pure. He is without sin.
Me: ummmm..but I'm not. I'm the masked llama!
Other voice: Yeah. I know.
Me: So what do I do?
Other voice: no idea....ummmm....stop reading Archie and read Sonic the Hedgehog instead? Its not like you're gonna pick up a crush for Princess Sally or anything, right?

So, again, asking "WWJD" didn't really help me at all. I couldn't "be Jesus" and just say "bad temptation, go away." Jesus went 40 days and 40 nights in the desert with no food and when Satan shows up with food Jesus says "no thanks." Even when I tell myself that I'm gonna eat at Subway instead of McDonald's because its healthier for me, if I'm an hour late for supper, I'm getting the Big-Mac meal cuz I am flipping starving!

They say that Jesus is 100% human and 100% God at once. Sure, the Bible does a good job of showing Jesus' humanity when he's grieving, it doesn't show him struggling with sin or "what should I do?" He always knows the answer. I don't always know the answer. I can't relate to someone who does.

I'm not sure what the solution is. "What would Peter do?" isn't really a good role model suggestion, either. He's the perfect example of "Act in Haste, Repent in Leisure."

Just my thoughts on the matter, thanks for reading. Comment if you like.

Not true, but fun!

2009-11-14T09:13:00.001-08:00

Five things that aren't true, but are fun to tell people.

1)Studies have shown that businesses that play Christmas music every Monday have higher office morale. "The week just seems happier," said one office worker. However, playing Christmas music all 5 days of the week just makes people sick of it.

2) The script for the live action Captain Planet movie set for a 2012 release has been leaked. Ma-Ti, the boy with "Heart" powers, will be killed off 1/2 through the movie, and the film will take a darker path. Overcome with rage and without heart to guide him, Captain Planet will become a violent eco-terrorist forcing the remaining Planeteers to stop him from committing acts such as impaling whalers with harpoons and beating to death with a 2x4 someone found clubbing baby seals.

3) Whenever the U.S. government destroys old and tattered bills, if the bill has a www.wheresgeorge.com stamp on it, the government must register that bill as "retired" with Where's George. This is in thanks for the increased use the dollar saw after the site went live.

4) 17 summer camps with "Crystal Lake" in their name or location went out of business within 2 years after the original Friday the 13th was released.

5) In order to promote a more healthy lifestyle, Super Mario will be given a slimmer more muscular look in future Mario Bros games. Nintendo of America issued the following press release "Mario is constantly running and jumping and playing sports and physically active, but he's still a pudgy plumber. We believe that it is sending the message that proper exercise doesn't affect your weight and Nintendo wants to promote healthy choices and healthy gamers. Mario will be even more Super than before!"

Pet Peeves Part 2

2009-04-23T11:26:00.001-07:00

I know its silly, but my grammatical wool is rubbed the wrong way whenever someone uses "X pride" where X=their, race, gender, sexuality, or lifestyle.

I'm gonna use "Male Pride" as an example, because I happen to be male and of the many things I am, being male is one of the least offensive.

I realize that pride is used as the opposite of shame to say "I'm not ashamed to be a male, I'm proud of it." However, I always think that whenever I'm proud of something, its because its an achievement. I'm proud to be self supporting. I'm proud to have beaten Ruby Weapon in FF7. I'm proud that "LLama Logic" is a known form of logic on the GiantITP forums. I'm proud that I can make the Kessel run in less that 12 Parsecs. I'm proud to live in a pineapple under the sea. These are all accomplishments. They are things that have been achieved through time and effort.

I didn't achieve maleness. I didn't even get to pick the "X" or "Y" chromosome. I just popped out male. No work or time went into being a male, it just kinda happened. The same can be said for race as well as gender and most people agree that sexuality and lifestyle are not choices, either.

Some will make the conclusion that by stating that I'm bothered by the phrase "Male Pride" that I'm ashamed to be a male, or perhaps even worse, a self hating male. This isn't the case. I'm very happy with my maleness. Being able to aim when I pee is a small thrill that I never take for granted. I'm just not proud of it. Instead of a "Proud to be a male" t-shirt, I'd much rather have a "Happy to be a male" t-shirt.

And yes, if you know me better, you may place just about any descriptor in the place of male, except for lazy. While I am lazy, I'm not terribly thrilled by it.

Reunited!!

2009-04-15T21:01:00.000-07:00

That is The Fairyland Story. When I was a kid, mom and I stayed at a hotel that had this game and the Willow arcade game. The Willow Arcade game is shocking hard, so I played a lot of Fairyland Story. I loved it and almost beat it. However, I never made it back to that hotel and the name of the game was lost in obscurity over the years. Much like a summer romance, I thought we'd never meet again, but...but....DESTINY INTERVENED!!

Yesterday I purchased Taito Arcade Classics 2 on a whim and one of the 35 games listed was "The Fairyland Story." Turns out I suck at it now, but I'm working on getting better again. GLEE!!

2009-04-10T15:20:00.000-07:00

Happy Easter!!

bad timing

2009-02-25T10:10:00.000-08:00

I'm sure its coincidence, but still rather awkward timing that the day I finally drop below 238 pounds (my wall, apparently) is the day that the button pops off on the pants I was wearing.

Christmas morning

2009-02-20T07:40:00.001-08:00

My mom is quite sneaky, but it all works out in the end.

As you may know, the newest game system I have is the PS2. Sure I'd love a newer console, but who has the money? Well, lots of people, but not me.

Christmas morning I woke up and headed out to see a bunch of presents under the tree. I started tearing into the first box and found..... a pair of socks! Ummmm....okay? The second box also had a pair of socks in them. The third and fourth box had the same. At this point, mom admitted that she had bought me a 6 pack of socks, but thought this would be a more fun way to present them, rather than simply giving me a six pack of wooly foot protection. The next box was a pair of socks, but also contained a Wii nunchuk?!?

I looked up at mom with a confused look and she acted shock with a "OH NO! How did that get in there?" She then pointed to a large present behind the tree and goes "Oh look! I wonder what that could be." Excitedly, I scurried over to it and opened it, optimistic but curious. The large box was .....Wii Play?!?!

I looked to mom, very confused now. I look around for something else, a present I might have missed or some explanation. Mom looked really confused too. "Were you expecting something else?" she asked.

"Ummmm....well, you know....with the controller and the game....I was kinda expecting a Wii."

Mom shook her head. "Nope. That's all you get for Christmas."

I just kinda stood there looking stunned. Mom smiled and asked if I wanted my Birthday present early. When I nodded she scurried off and came back with a large wrapped box. Upon unwrapping it, I found a Wii!!!

That was a very strange, but very happy Christmas morning.

Appreciate a Dragon Day

2009-01-16T10:03:00.000-08:00

January 16th is annual Appreciate a Dragon Day. I'm not sure how this day started, but it is a fun day to celebrate. Since I don't know many dragons, I do want to say "Hi" and send appreciations to a kobold that I know. They are kinda draconic. Hiya Chunklets!!

OWWW!!

2009-01-04T11:43:00.000-08:00

Exercise painful! Tummy hurts. Arms hurt. Legs will probably hurt soon.

Wow. I'm out of shape. I can't believe 20 push-ups, 20 sit-ups, and 2:00 minutes of jumping jacks would do that to me. I know it will be a long process to be back to being fit. I worked really hard to become this flabby mess.

Neutral?

2008-11-18T20:50:00.000-08:00

Hmmmmm....I've decided I'm a rather neutrally aligned person.

For instance, I am willing to help donate to a cause so 4 of us can buy a sheep for a needy family in a 3rd world country. That's good. However, I am only doing so with the stipulation that every effort be made so that the family will name the sheep "Sir Buster T. Woolycoat." That's...kinda bad, I think, so I end up neutral.

2008-10-24T19:59:00.000-07:00

Played Lunch Money tonight. Great game. Very quick but fun, especially if you RP it, right. Should be added to Christmas list.

Speaking of Christmas lists. Here is a wide list of stuff that I would like. Its by no means a complete list, nor must a present be on it to bring me joy.

Games
Carcassone Expansions: Builders and Traders
Carcassone Expansions: Mayors and Abbeys
Lunch Money
Zombies 3: Shop Till you Drop .....Dead
Humans!!!
Zombies 4: The End
Medievil
Munchkin Impossible
Super Munchkin: The Narrow S Cape
Munchkin 5: Deranged
Munchkn Booty
kill Dr. Lucky
Grave Robbers II
Bell Bottomed Badasses
En Garde!

Comics :
Death of Superman TPB
Walking Dead Volume 8

Movies on DVD
Robin Hood (Disney)
Robin Hood Men in Tights
Three Musketeers (Disney)
Airplane
Oliver and Company

Many movies I probably haven't seen.

Video games on PS2:
Silent Hill 2
Silent Hill 3
Tony Hawk Project 8
Tony Hawk Proving Ground
Jak and Daxter
That Game with the Mummy and the Cursed Sphinx
Resident Evil Outbreak 1 or 2
Resident Evil 4
Resident Evil Code Veronica

T-Shirts:
You know me pretty well and know what I like. Funny is good.

I'm sure I can add more later. This is a helpful guide for those in need. Most of you know what I want and like and I trust your judgments.

Accumulation of clothing

2008-10-09T12:07:00.001-07:00

GAH!! I own over 70 T-shirts! I need to really go through and thin the herd. I was thinking I had like 30 or so, maybe 40 tops. How did I acquire so many shirts?? I need to get down to like 20 or 30 in time for Christmas.

Talk Like A Pirate Day

2008-09-19T21:08:00.000-07:00

Yarr! Today was a good TLAPD. We had a 30% off sale at work for anyone who came and talked like a pirate.

To promote this, I dressed in my pirate garb and wandered the campus talking to people and generally promoting the sale.

It was one of the best work days ever!!

Gah! I'm in a hurry and I'm running late and the darn picture won't post.

http://s111.photobucket.com/albums/n141/maskedllama/?action=view&current=IMG_0828.jpg&t=1221856358429

Sigh. What a mess. If you wanna see pirate me. That's the link. Warning. I'm not wearing my mask.

See you all later.

Tired of hearing about your song

2008-08-19T22:27:00.000-07:00

Dear people in charge of Hamlet 2,

I realize you wrote a song about Jesus being sexy. Please stop trying to remind me with every webpage I visit and every commercial break. If I didn't find it funny the first time, its not going to grow on me and if I did find it funny, I'm darn sick of hearing about it. I suspect thats really all your movie has since seems to be the selling point of your entire marketing campaign.

If the entire movie is nothing more than a vehicle to push your song, then why not save yourself the money of shooting a movie and simply make a music video. You'll probably make more profits in the long run that way.

Sadly, I've seen the other scenes for the movie and they look funny enough to be part of an entertaining movie. I think I could enjoy a comedy about some crazy drama teacher who tries to put on a wild play to save his program. I like Hamlet, the premise of making a Hamlet 2 sounds silly enough to intrigue me to watch it. I'm concerned with First Amendment rights. It doesn't even bother me all that much that you keep trying to rile up religious folks with your tacky crucifixion jokes. It sounds to me like you took a good premise with great actors and turned it into a weak "shock" comedy who's sole purpose is to promote a song that's featured in it.

Umm...if anyone who reads this knows the marketing manager or producer or director of Hamlet 2 personally, please pass this along.

On the plus side, I prereg'ed for Dragon Con today!!!

Virtual Blood Sucking Goodness

2008-07-28T19:47:00.001-07:00

Today I went to rent a game from Movie Gallery for the 1st time. I chose Movie Gallery because they are the only place that had Mister Mosquito. I choose Mister Mosquito because it is the only PS2 that I know that lets you play as a mosquito.

The price of renting the game is $6.99 for 7 nights. On a whim, and knowing that many places are trying to phase out their PS2 selection for PS3 games, I asked "This game wouldn't be for sale by any chance?" He checks his computer, laughs and announces that it is, in fact, for sale. The price to buy it was $4.99. I walked out of the store with my brand new copy of Mister Mosquito.

Just in case

2008-07-06T12:35:00.001-07:00

I've done the math and crunched the numbers and there is a 99.99% chance that I will die. There are outliers such as Rapture or the remote possibilities that I will be bitten by a vampire and made immortal or gain immortality through other methods, but none of these seem likely. I've also concluded that there is a 97% chance that I will die in such a manner as a funeral is required. I suppose I could die in a zombie horde, alien invasion, or nuclear holocaust and that would prevent me from receiving a proper funeral, I think, but the odds of that are not too high. So, while I don't plan on dying anytime soon, I believe it makes sense to plan my funeral. After all, it will be my last chance to really affect things on Earth, so I want to do it right.

First off, I've been to a few funerals. They are usually sad and somber and mostly all the same. This is very anti-llama. I try to bring joy and chaos and confusion to the world, none of which is really accomplished at your typical funeral. Therefore, a typical funeral won't do at all. I'll have to specially plan one.

The visitation- The visitation is one of the more important parts of the funeral. Its where everyone hangs out and gets together. Its the most exciting portion of the funeral really, but its usually rather boring for children. Its rarely someone they know and standing around for an hour, being solemn is no fun. What we need is a way to entertain kids, raise money for charity, and make people go "What the Shock is wrong with this picture." I've talked with my roommate (ex-roommate) and he has agreed to run the "Poke a Dead Guy with a Stick" booth.

The plan is simple. Two pokes for a dollar is what people will be charged. We'll probably go with some blunt poking devices because I'd be really icky if I was actually punctured. I think a pool stick would work great, or maybe a nice long actual stick. All the proceeds will go to "LLamas for Lima" and will go to spreading happiness and llama joy. I also want to have some TV's brought in and playing kids movies off to the side somewhere. Movies playing will be Princess Bride, Emperor's New Groove, and Disney's Robin Hood. That should last the entire visitation. If it doesn't then we can always replay the movies. Also, lets have some decent snacks and beverages there. Root beer, lots of root beer.

The actual funeral I want done in much the same way. No more poking a dead guy with a stick because that would be rude to whoever is hosting my eulogy, but I do want snacks and drinks and movies playing off to the side for kids and anyone who "has to watch the kids" rather than hear someone talk about me. I suppose, I'd want a eulogy of humorous stuff, if people have any particularly funny stories about me that they'd like to share, or amusing quotes or pictures or something.

As for the burial, there's not much that can be done there. Although, if the technology is there, I'd love for the classic Mario sound of Mario going down a warp pipe to be played whenever I'm actually lowered in.

Oh, one major thing, before I forget, and if nothing else of this planning is pulled off (because none of it probably will be) I DO NOT WANT SOME STUPID EXPENSIVE METAL COFFIN!! I am not willing to spend 3000 dollars in luxuries on myself in life, why, oh why would you think I'd want it done for me in death. I would be most pleased if someone were to get a nice cardboard box and lay me inside, but I do more spent on snack trays and soda than I do on a casket.

As for the preacher, I don't have anyone in mind, but maybe I could just have "story time" instead. That'd be nice. Oh, and I want to be wearing the trademark black cloth mask whenever I'm buried. Oh, and shorts and a T-shirt. Don't dress me up in some nice suit that I would never wear while my blood pump worked. That's disrespectful.

I realize that this is rather morbid and probably anyone reading this is disturbed, but keep in mind that I don't actually see anyone fulfilling any of these requests, nor do I intend on needing this plan to be activated soon.

but..but...does he get away??

2008-06-22T17:06:00.001-07:00

I just bought a 3 episode collection of the old Lone Ranger TV show. Episode 2 ended in a cliffhanger and episode 3 was from a completely different season! (I can tell because episode 2 was black and white and episode 3 was in color.) Why on Earth would someone do that??

Ah well, for three episodes for only 89 cents. I suppose I shouldn't look a silver white gift horse in the mouth.

The purpose of the little cloth bag

2008-05-13T20:58:00.000-07:00

Its a little frustrating that whenever I'm checking out at Food City, Kroger, Wal-Mart, or Ingle's that even when I decline to use plastic bags to carry my groceries home that the bag boys take the bag they were offering to me, wad it up, and throw it away. The whole reason I'm carrying around this silly looking cloth Ingle's bag is to prevent the waste of plastic bags. Narf!

Oh well, by my estimation my plastic bag usage is down by 84% since umm....well about a month ago when I bought this cloth bag. I hope that I'm at least making a little impact in the attempt to cut down on excess trash.

2008-05-05T21:07:00.000-07:00

As some ....well, a couple of you know, I was recently dating. It ended for a couple of reasons. One was that I don't think she really liked me. I think she liked the me that she saw at work (she works at the same college I work at). While, I'm not completely different from who I am outside my job, there are enough differences that Tony S****n (work) and Tony LLama (outside of work) can be two different people. She refused to call me llama and she didn't seem to like it when others did as well and I know that she didn't care much for the llama hat and the llama jacket/costume.

I was talking to some people about this after we broke up, one of which is an older friend. She explained that women that I date won't want to encourage the llama name. They feel that its self-demeaning at worst and goofy at best. A llama is a pack animal and that I have more potential than a pack animal. While she said this trying to be helpful and complimentary, I think we aren't looking at this the same way.

The llama part of me is a part of me that I'm extremely proud of. It symbolizes to me, the times that I've been brave enough to poke out of my little scared shell and be adventurous, willing to endure the mocking laughter of people if they didn't react favorably to me. Its cheesy, but I can honestly say in all cases except for in dating, my life has been improved by going "Okay, how would Atreyu (the character I portray) handle this situation" and then going from there. I'm, in many cases, very shy, Atreyu isn't. Atreyu is that part of me that is goofy and outgoing and overly optimistic. I really don't feel like locking him away anytime soon; he's fun.

I do realize that by continuing with the "llama thing" I may never attract the lass of my dreams, and I'm fine with that. If I reach the point where I'm no longer fine with that, then I'll change. I'm dynamic. I'm trying to eat healthier and get in better shape because I didn't like the direction my health was taking. Its not going spectacularly, but I'm working at it because I see the need to adapt and improve.

Plah, I spent 4 weeks on and off writing this, and it didn't really turn out the way it sounded in my head during the first week.

Okay, so its a bit late

2008-04-06T21:43:00.001-07:00

(okay, so its two weeks late in being posted over here. I'm hoping to have actual good content up soon.)

Its been an interesting Spring Break up to this point. I went to spend a few days with my best friend growing up,Tim, at his college apt. I got in Sunday evening and Tim and I just hung out playing guitar hero. Monday, St. Patrick's Day, was fun and exciting. Tim went to class and I hung out, playing Resident Evil 4. Great game, by the way, but after he returned, we invited his neighbor and friend, Zack, to go to the local pizza place. We all went out and they both finished off a pitcher of Amberbock, apiece. As we walked back to the apt, we met Tim's other local friend and her boyfriend sitting on a bench drinking Guiness. The party of 5 headed back to their place for more beer and to play Curses.

After a fun game of Curses, someone remembered that they don't tie up the canoes by the campus lake, its a large campus so we all headed out to borrow one. After a 20 minute walk, we reached the canoes. As a (formerly) trained lifeguard, I agreed to hold everyone cell phones and stay on land while they went canoeing, you know, just in case. So the four drunks headed out into the lake (the shallow part, for those concerned with the safety concerns of canoeing at night while intoxicated) armed only with large sticks for paddling, and made it about 2 minutes before tipping over. I counted heads,4 went under, 4 came up, no one was flailing. They were fine. We all walked back to our apts and that was the end of the St. Patrick's Day party. Random note: despite not wearing green, I was not harmed in any way.

Tuesday was another lazy day, but it rained hard ALL day and pretty much flooded me in. Much like the canoeing story, this one is much more interesting in real life, but here it is. As 8 PM rolled around, and still it poured. Curious just how flooded it was, I opened Tim's window and looked outside. This somehow causes the screen to fall out and plummet downward the 10 feet to his downstair neighbor's front door as Tim has a second story apt. Hmmmmmm. This neighbor happens to be the lady and her boyfriend that we went canoeing with yesterday. We walked downstairs to retrieve the screen. In a valiant attempt to escape the heavy cold rain, I lean against the building wall; Tim with his umbrella grabs the screen. As soon as Tim grabs the screen, moves, and says "lets go eat," their window shatters outward less than 2 feet from where I'm standing. I've never swore so loudly in public as I did right then and scampered away from the explosive window.. Her and her boyfriend appear at the window, seem very shocked to see Tim standing there and me behind him. She asked if "we were okay" and we stammered out "we're fine not hurt going to eat now bye." and took off out of there. We're still not entirely sure what happened, but it made for a really really interesting experience.

Well, that's enough rambling for this week,

bye everybody.

Muppet Madness

2008-03-10T12:41:00.000-07:00

In order to correct a deficient childhood, (apparently a childhood lacking in Muppets is not a complete childhood) a week ago we held a Muppet Movie marathon. The only Muppet movie I had seen was Muppets in Space and I really didn't care much for that one. Too much Andy Dick, in muppet form.

We started the day off with Kubb, actually, because people were running late. Kubb is a swedish lawn game. Its basicaly "throw the stick at the brick, then throw the brick shortly thereafter." I lost. It was tragic and sad, but lots of fun!!

By the time the game was over, people were arriving and so we started with "Muppet Classic Theatre" a retelling of 6 classic children's tales with Muppets involved. It was much funnier than Space, so I we relieved and excited all aat the same time.

After that, we moved on to Muppet Treasure Island. I love Tim Curry and he plays a great bad guy so well. This movie was pretty funny but a little hard to follow at times, not because of the movie, but because 1 year olds are amusing to watch as well and when the 1 year old starts playing with the (I think she's) 3 year old, its just hilarious. It should be noted that Muppet Treasure Island does differ greatly from the book in many ways. Its a peeve of mine, but it was still a good movie.

After a break for supper, we started the original Muppet Movie. Ic an see why Muppet movies are so popular now. That one was great. It had some laugh out loud moments, amusing plot, funny characters, and awesome cameo appearances. Well, I'm about all typed out for the day, so thus concludes another irrelevant journal entry. Thanks for reading.

FWA FTW!

2008-02-19T18:00:00.000-08:00

Hiya,
I spent the weekend in Atlanta at the Furry Weekend Atlanta convention. With 3 Dragon-Con's and a Gen Con under my belt, I'm no rookie when it comes to wild weekends of little food and sleep surrounded by strange sights and wild costumes, but FWA was my first "furry" experience.

I really had a blast that weekend. I tried to dabble in lots of things and tried to meet many people in the fandom and overall I think I succeeded. The only real failure, I think, was the panel on zen meditation and that wasn't the panel's fault at all. I was already exhausted because I'd been up since 3 AM to drive down, and well, they told me to be still and try to shut down my mind. I spent 10 minutes trying to stay half-way awake enough not to disturb the others in the panel. I had to leave 1/2 through the event.

Fortunately, I was jolted wide awake soon after. I ended up rooming with some people that I didn't know, but Kaku, my traveling partner did. They are all fursuiters, which for those who don't know, are people who own animal costumes, much like a sports mascot would wear, and they dress up periodically during the conventions. (Someone please correct me if my description is inaccurate.) These suits are really really really cool and I want one, but that's not the point of this paragraph, the point is that well, these suits have impressive masks and they are kinda fragile, so they have to be placed where they won't be damaged. I didn't think about this whenever I went to open the closet door to see if they had extra sheets and saw a HUGE opossum head staring back at me from within the closet!! Fortunately, it was cartoony or I'd have had to run to Wal-Mart to grab extra underroos.

I really cannot stress enough just how friendly everyone was at the convention. It was a wonderful experience and just an all around great 3 days. I've probably rambled enough for one blog entry. Most of what I did doesn't translate well to blog stories. Munchkin and Settlers are very fun to play, but not to read about. The same can be said for Rock Band and Guitar Hero 2. I'll try to get some pictures up soon.

P.S. If you have a chance to watch an anime movie called "One Stormy Night," you should. Its really good.

Self Improvement project take 1

2008-02-06T20:51:00.000-08:00

Hiya! I'm Atreyu and I'm the llama seen here.

You may wonder why I'm here and its, well, its kinda creepy really. I'm here because whenever Tony tries to take an analytical look at himself, he likes to sorta have me do it for him. Maybe its because he feels if he's less connencted then he'll be less prejudiced about himself. In any case, I'm gonna take a few minutes to outline the plans that Tony is making to help with his Self-Improvement Project. Less do this by category.

Exercise: Tony is attempting to get back in the habit of regular exercise. He's been semi-successful about hitting the Milligan gym before going home from work, but he still hasn't been able to work himself up to doing push-ups or jumping jacks or anything like that. Maybe in the future we'll work on that, but for now, I'm encouraging the exercise bike. A bonus about the bike is that he's using that time to start reading books again. He's working on Fast Food Nation right now and has plans for Blue Like Jazz after that.

Food: Tony knows that all his exercise will have minimal to zero effect, if he doesn't eat healthier. He's working on a few adjustments to shrink his belly and enlarge his wallet. We'll have to talk about those on a different day, though, because number 4 on the adjustment list is to start getting to bed at a decent hour. We've set a "BED NOW" time of 11:45 for February and its that time.

Thanks for listening and I'll see ya next time,

Atreyu Llama!

Tasty

2007-11-09T06:50:00.000-08:00

Poor blog needs love.

Dear blog,

Last night I ate at Alley Cat sandwich shop. It was very tasty and quick and friendly. It was a little more expensive than Subway, but I could taste the quality improvement. Now I'm hungry. CRAP! Its not even 10 AM yet.

HEY NEW CONTENT

2007-10-23T09:01:00.000-07:00

Posted mostly to push my whiny "I hate Transformers" post from the top.

Two names you go by:
1 TONY
2. LLAMA

Two things you are wearing right now:
1. LLAMA CHARM
2. WATCH!

Two of your favorite things to do:
1. PLAY VIDEO GAMES
2. HIKE

Things you want very badly at the moment:
1 A TASTY NON-CARBONATED BEVERAGE THAT ISN’T WATER
2. SUBWAY SOUNDS GOOD

Two favorite pets you have had/have
1. OODLES THE WONDER DOG
. TACO BELL DOG, MY PLUSH CAR GUARDIAN

Two things you did last night:
1. HIKED IN SYCAMORE SHOALS
> 2. PLAYED SLY COOPER’S TIME TRIAL

Two things you ate today
> 1. HAM SANDWICH
> 2. BAGEL

Two people you've talked to today
1. JUSTIN, MY FLATMATE
2. TACO BELL DOG, MY CAR GUARDIAN

Two things you're doing tomorrow: 1. CLEANING THE PLACE A BIT
> 2. GOING TO WORK, PLAH!!

Two longest Car Rides you've been on:
1. ARIZONA
2. FLORIDA WITH A STOP IN CANADA

Your favorite holidays:
1 HALLOWEEN
2 INTERNATIONAL TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY

Two favorite beverages:
1. ROOTBEER
2. GRAPE JUICE

Now apparently the E-Gods demand that you fill this out as well or face the wrath of Churikra!

I'm sorry Humanity. I just don't like you in that way.

2007-10-16T22:33:00.001-07:00

I just got done watching Transformers: The Movie.
I've said it before and I'll probably have to say it again. If the title of a movie features certain key words in it, I expect to see the majority of the movie focused on those keywords. When I went to see Pirates of the Caribbean, it focused a lot on pirates. Pirates got all the good lines and memorable scenes. There were lots of pirates and lots of pirates fighting and swindling and being sneaky and painting daisies on a big red rubber ball. You know, pirate-y things!

The problem with Transformers is that there are too many SHOCKING humans in my movie about giant robots. Humans eat up about 85 % of this movie. Its not just that they are there, which is bad enough, but they are handled so incredibly poorly, its not funny haha. Its funny "I'm horrified, but my brain doesn't know how to truly process this wretched scene that is unfolding before me, so I'm just going to laugh because laugh is the brain's default action when it doesn't really know what's going on." If the movie says "Transformers" in the title, I expect to see lots of Transformers and cool fights with Transformers. Yes, the last 30 minutes was great, but the hour and a half building up to it could have been reduced to about 15 minutes of plot exposition and "Hi, I'm Sam. I'm the token human and I'll be the hero. I'm the lovable loser. Well, I'm supposed to be, but I'm really a bossy prick who brings shame to my family name. Sadly I'm going to get the girl at the end and probably breed despite the fact that the world would be a better place if my grandfather had been the last of us."

I will admit that I burst out into a belly laugh at the end of the movie when the words "Directed by Michael Bay" appear and the movie starts playing "What I've Done" by Linkin Park. I think its symbolic of an apology from the director.

lied to

2007-10-09T04:43:00.000-07:00

I've been on Facebook 5 minutes and have yet to be approached by a creepy child molester. If CNN were to be believed, I should have 8 strangers wanting to know me better by now. I'm not really disappointed, but someone should fact check CNN a bit better on these internet things.

Chubby Bunny

2007-10-02T18:22:00.000-07:00

Hi Ken. Hi Ginger.

Shearing

2007-10-02T18:08:00.000-07:00

You know, as strange as it sounds, and as much as it seems like a semi-creepy attempt to be more llama-like, whenever I get a haircut, I don't receive a haircut, so much as I am simply sheared. I hadn't really noticed until I was watching in the mirror as the stylist just took the clippers and buzzed the hair until it was 1/2 inch even on all sides. This may explain my stubbornness to pay over 7.50 for a haircut and why I'm appalled at people charging 14 dollars for a simple trim. Seriously, its 7 minutes of work and its not hard work at that. I'm not picky, I just want the hair to be easy to manage and look even.

Overall the haircut did end up costing me 10.00 because I tipped the lass who had to put up with me a good amount, but she did a good job. Maybe not with the hair, no one has commented on that, so I don't know if its "Good" or not, but she made it an enjoyable experience. She had a wonderful story about trying to cut the hair of some extremely intoxicated lady who threatened to throw up anytime the chair spun. We even talked about Alpaca shearing technique and how odd it was that the Dutch version of Santa Claus had "6 to 8" black men as helpers instead of reindeer. Its odd that no precise number has been decided on even though they've had several decades to take a headcount.
I tip heavily for an entertaining hairdresser or stylist or whatever the proper term may be. To me, that's half the fun of a haircut. Learning new stories, talking with these people as our threads mingle for this short time on the great tapestry of existance. Good times.

Quickie

2007-05-23T18:00:00.000-07:00

Sadly, as much as I want to blog about the events of the day, I will not say mean things about co-workers on a space as open as a blog. I do feel that simply saying "I don't feel so bad about myself right now. I'm in many ways too childish, but sometimes I am reminded that I have a maturity that I should be proud of."

I will say this. I really amazed by the irony of our 4th of July decorations having been made in China. I cut the little made in China tag off. It made me sad.

Friday is Towel Day. It is the day we mourn the loss of Douglas Adams, the author of the [u]Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy[/u] series of books. Its easy to celebrate. You simply carry a towel with you everywhere you go. Seeing as Mom is coming into town, this should be fun.

Backstory

2007-05-12T12:48:00.000-07:00

Hmmmm: I just wanna start working on this backstory. This seems like a good a place as any to keep it for now.

Jarren was raised in the Temple of Heironous to be a mighty paladin (for now, he may be a cleric later) and smiter of evil. He devoted his life to serving The Invincible and whenever he was first blessed with the ability to detect evil around him (or cast spells and turn undead.) he went out with a party of his fellow worshippers to destroy an evil lich that had been kidnapping and experimenting on the local villagers. The lich was ready with a nasty crew of undead for the group and a brutal battle ensued. Jarren took a few skeleton claws to the back and passed out from the pain.
He woke up alone in a cell. None of his fellow worshippers were around.
He suffered in the prison waiting for a rescue because one of the teachings of the Temple he was raised in was that "No one is left behind." He was mocked regularly by the lich and fed just enough to stay alive. After a month of waiting for the some sign that Heironeous going to rescue him he gradually began to give up hope and grow bitter at his temple and his god for leaving him trapped. All their talk of honor and brotherhood had apparently meant nothing because they had abandoned him.
One night while sitting in his cell, he heard a voice. The voice identified itself as a servant of Hextor. It offered Jarren a chance for freedom if he pledged service to Hextor. Jarren refused because he knew that Hextor was evil, but the servant appealed to Jarren's disgust with Heironeous. Also, the voice pointed out that "your brotherhood exaggerated their honor, don't you think they exaggereated the evilness of Hextor. After all, Hextor has come to save you."
Desperate to escape his prison and also to spite Heironeous, Jarren agreed. A gauntlet appeared on the ground. Gripped in its were siz arrows. Following the instructions of the voice, Jarren slipped he gauntlet on his right hand and cut his left arm with one of the arrows. He placed his bleeding arm on the wall; blood began to pour from the wound and formed into the holy symbol of Heironeous. Jarren punched the lightning bolt on the wall with his gloved hand, crumbling the wall, opening a hole to the outdoors and freeing the poor kid.

Jarren made his way to a Temple of Hextor where he began his training under a new deity. The teachings of his youth haven't died easily, so his mentality is a combination of Hextor's and Heironeous' teachings. His domains are Law and War, because both Hextor and his brother allow them. The time in imprisonment have left his body physically weaker (Con : 8) but he is able to endure injury and pain better than most. (Feats: Endurance and Die Hard.) After a few years in the temple, Jarren was called to go out in the world and represent Hextor. He was instructed to show his supplication to Hextor at all times by the head priest who knew that Jarren was not proud of serving evil, but felt honorbound to keep his word.

Jarren has a small house in this town. It has a small altar in Hextor in it. Any time Jarren goes out in public he has his holy symbol around his neck and the spiked gauntlet on his right hand. In combat, he wears a fearsome spiked full plate armor and swings a heavy flail.

ITEMS:
Holy Symbol, silver - 25 GP
Weapon: MW Spiked gauntlet 305 GP
Weapon: MW heavy Flail 315
Armor: MW Spiked Fullplate 1750 GP
Weapon: MW Mighty +2 Composite Longbow 575 GP
Weapon: 20 arrows 1 GP

House: GP 1000
Secret Closet in House 250 GP
Nice Altar to Hextor behind Secret Closet 350 GP
Chests x5 2GP/each totaling 10 GP
2 Average locks 40Gp/each totaling 80 GP
1 Cleric's Vestments 5GP
3 Travelers Clothes 1GP/each totaling 3 GP
BackPack 2Gp
One chest with Average Lock contains the money (hidden in shrine)
One chest w/o lock contains clothes
The other chests sit upstairs unused.
2 Everburning objects: an amulet and a torch. 100 GP spent on the ruby dust to cast the spells.
The torch is kept in the basement and the amulet is kept wherever he leaves it.

gold left after above spending =629 GP
600 GP kept in chest
and 29 kept in coin purse

How quickly a month passes

2007-04-29T17:24:00.000-07:00

Dang! I meant to start doing this once a week. As it is now, I've snuck in on Jared's computer to try to update something.

The biggest thing I should talk about is VIC is in danger of closing. VIC is the college that I work at so this does affect me. However, I don't feel like dwelling on that here, especially since it may come back to bite me at work.

I will talk about Thursday when I was in the dunk tank. That was fun. I love being in the dunk tank. Its one of the few times I get to play the "bad guy" by trash talking people. VI had one on Thursday because it was part of their "Spring Fling" week. Since it was 3 balls for a dollar to try to raise money, I did my best to provoke bystanders. I made 4 signs, 3 promoting Milligan (a rival college and my Alma Mater) and one promoting the fact that I was the textbook manager.

As soon as I got in there, I started singing Milligan's Alma Mater and yelling Pro-Milligan slogans. Some people took the bait, but since it was starting to rain semi-heavily, not too many people were out. PLAH!! All in all, it was a lot of fun though. I love a dunk tank.

Spring Break

2007-03-28T18:42:00.000-07:00

Ah, Its nice to not be so grown-up that I can't enjoy spring break. My canadian friend, Indurain, from the OOTS forum drove down 14 hours to pick me up and take me to Indianapolis with him and another OOTS fan. There we had a gathering of 9 forum members for the weekend. HUZZAH! Friday night we played Apples to Apples. Many people there hadn't played it before, but they learned quickly. The only two words I won were "crazy" and "crazed." I think El Jaspero won with 8 cards.

On Saturday, we were introduced to Kubb. Its a swedish lawn game that involves the throwing of sticks at targets and then defending your targets and proper strategic placement of the fallen targets. Its sooooo much fun that we played 2 games, then went to do something else, and played 2 more games, and Sunday morning before leaving we snuck in 2 more. In this day and age of fancy electronics, I smile to see I can still be entertained with 15 peices of wood.

We also played Iron Heroes on Saturday night. El Jaspero is a fun GM and it was a good time had by all. The system is scarce magic system where most of the classes are variations of fighters. It used tokens, too. Tokens are a lot of fun whenever you use M&M's for them. The reserve hit points were an interesting touch, as well. JOY!

Curses was also played. This was the best game of Curses yet. Everyone was into their curses and not just fulfilling the curse, but really hamming it up. We had a Scooby-Doo who thought he was Napeoloen. WOOOOO. Poor Thes, she tried so hard, but ultimately fell victim to the evil "Can't bend elbows" "wrists must touch chest combo" and lost.

I won a snoring contest, too. I shouldn't be proud of that, but I am.
P.S. Its fun to get scratched behind the ears. Maybe its placebo, but its glee.

Bugger!

2007-02-25T15:25:00.000-08:00

Drat! I didn't get around to blogging anything today, but it wasn't a totally unproductive day. I did about 30 minutes of dishes and most of the cups are clean now. HUZZAH!

Last night I GM'ed for the first time in a long time. It went rather well, I think. The party met, they fought some stuff, they kinda formed that "we are a party" bond and most importantly, everyone seemed to be laughing a lot.

People seemed willing to do it again, so huzzah for that. I hope to do it again.

Speaking of gaming, I'm late to Jared's game, so its time to head out.

Jared's is frightening. I've given up soda for Lent and never is the backsliding easier than when gaming at Jared's. The soda flows like wine in the palace of Dionysus, but I've got a plan!

See you later,
Tony llama

Will power and religion

2007-02-19T19:44:00.000-08:00

I wonder what's wrong with me. Presumably, nothing is wrong with me and I'm a perfectly normal man, but it seems odd to me.

Let's take a look at some of the teachings of the church
1) Help out those in need.
2) Don't wank.
These really have nothing in common, however, they are what I was taught growing up.

Now, see, here is where the confusing part appears.
1) Last night, at 2:45 AM, I was on the tail end of an 8 hour trip home from Ohio. I had to be up in 3 hours for work, so I was greatly looking forward to whatever time I could spend in Sandman's Realm. I was 300 feet from exit 36 when by the side of the road is a truck with someone waving their arms for attention. Against my own better judgment, and being genuinely afraid I was about to expose myself to someone who meant to wrong me, I pull off the side of the road and go see if he needs help. He was a local fellow who was returning home and thought he could make it to exit 36's shell station. So, I gave the fellow a ride to Shell, then to Citgo because Shell was closed, and finally to the Shell at exit 38 because the Citgo's pumps were on, but refused to relinquish their gas into his gas can. Since he only had 2 dollars, I pulled out my credit card and paid for his gas. He did give me the 2 dollars that he had. Then we drove back to his truck, I dropped him off, and went on my way home. When I got home, I felt the desire to masturbate before bed, because I was frustrated about the 9 and a half hour day I was about to have on only 3 hours of sleep. So, I did. Then I went to bed.

Now....here is what bothers me. I was willing to risk being robbed, beaten, car-jacked, killed, or worse, to help out a stranger because I believe it is what God would want me to do. I think it is what Jesus would do. However, I was not willing to tolerate the 2 minutes of sexual frustration I would have had before falling to sleep. It just seems weird to me that I'd be willing to do so much, but not willing to do so little. What's up with that?

Canadian Bacon

2007-02-06T17:10:00.000-08:00

Well, the trip to Canada was full of wacky goodness including going 30+ hours without sleep, but since I did hardly get any sleep, I need to catch up on that tonight. This weekend I'll expound on the trip.

I did have a Timbit, though. TASTY!

Canadian Goodness

2007-02-02T08:15:00.000-08:00

I'm on my way to Canada. Well, not right now, but shortly. Right now, I'm at Amanda's house. Amanda is probably better known as Alarra on one of the forums that I frequent.
I drove to her place last night and today we are driving to Toronto to meet other forum members. This is the first time I've ever spent the night at the residence of another forum member. I was pleasantly surprised to NOT wake up chained to a bed, sown into a wool fursuit, and find Amanda cackling in the kitchen about her new pet llama. In fact, it was a rather uneventful night. Hopefully, the trip to Canada will be uneventful as well. Canada itself should be a lot of fun. I want to try a Timbit. Apparently its a doughnut hole filled with a tasty paste.
Hopefully, we'll have a long session of the OOTS board game. I'm excited. I hope my character (chosen randomly) is Elan. If I end up as Belkar, all that hard work I've put into making myself seem like a nice person on the boards is going to flushed down the drain in a glorious night of PvP stabbity death.
Yes, it is foolish to spend 38 hours on the road in 4 days to spend 24 hours with people, but its fun and its a rare opporunity. I am aware of the foolishness, I just don't care about it. I got a classic "Sigh. You're an adult" from mom whenever I told her of my plans. Well, hope to write more soon.
Farewell, secret public Journal.

Testing

2006-12-06T20:58:00.000-08:00

oooh, I'm not sure how well this works, but lets try this.

Hurray! It worked.

Now I just need something to blog about.

Filler

2006-06-29T19:23:00.000-07:00

Until I actually rebemmber to take the time and blog. Well, it seems that I am almost officially addicted to the OOTS forums now, at least when it comes to Role-Playing. But who can blame me? well, you can, but I don't care because its a nice place to RP. Its free form using the D&D rules. Are there problems, SHOCK YES. There is no one GM so things can get out of hand, and sometimes people are just BAD and you have to reign them in, but still, I laugh, alot during the sessions and I enjoy my llama character quite a bit. He's fun to play and he's well liked on the boards. Also, he's had a few touching moments of character growth, which is something that I find that I cannot pull off in a traditional pen and paper tabletop setting. Its no one's fault but my own, however, I find the bigger the group, the less likely I am to speak out or to make notice to myself, perhaps its because I was taught not to speak over people, and more people = more peoplle talking. but I think its BS taht I was taught not to speak out over people. Well, I was taught not to talk about people when they aren't around, but if I don't share frustrations with others about people then I grow in anger at the people and then I hit them and it makes me sad.

Are you still reading this? why? I'm just streaming.

Here's a discussion on Larry the Cable Guy. I'm sick of him. "Git'R'Dun" Its not funny anymore. Your movie just looked stupid. Your role in "Cars" was funny, but not because of anything you did. Time to go away now, you can still hang out and do your comedy thing, but just, stop being everywhere and we'll get along fine. YAY! we've reached a decision. I think.

2006-06-11T15:07:00.000-07:00

May 25th was towel day. Towel day is the day we mourn the death of Douglas Adams, the popular author of the famous "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" series. One of the most famous things to come out of the books is the advice "Always carry a towel." The reason is explained in this passage below. (Ahem, the excerpt of the book, stop looking for secret doors in the floor.)

"A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitch hiker can have. Partly it has great practicalvalue - you can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapours; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a mini raft down the slow heavy river Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand-combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or to avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mindboggingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you - daft as a bush, but very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough."

On towel day, thousands (maybe more) of mourners show their thanks to the author by following that advice and literally carrying a towel around with them everywhere. I first read about this at work. Since I was at work, I did not have a towel, nor did I actually want to carry one around at work, (semi-professional and all) However I did note the occassion on Penguinsushi and the OOTS forum so that my friends could enjoy the festivities.

After work however, I swung by my apt and changed into swim trunks because I was hitting the pool with some friends. Yes, I grabbed 2 towels. The first was for swimming the other for the rest of the night. Swimming was nice, we played some pool Frisbee, had some interesting conversations including the line "I have never seen a humaniod with the crispity, crunchitty, peanut buttery subtype"

After swimming, I headed out to Steve's. We were all going to see the midnight showing of x-3. Much to Ginger's amusement/dismay (but not shock) I walked up to Steve's place with a towel clearly displayed over my shoulder. To make this quick, I did carry the towel with me throughout the night. Even at the movies. The only people who asked about it were the other members of our party and a friend we bumped into from VIC.

The best part that must be worth mentioning is that after the movie was over, it was POURING down rain. On the way to the car, everyone got soaked except for me because I had a towel to protect me. Then the person I was riding with, who was giving me heck for carrying it, had to borrow it to dry off. The joy of having a silly internet phenomon actually come in handy.

2006-05-12T11:47:00.000-07:00

I wonder if anyone else listens to the radio to get in contact with their subconsciousness. I remember that many big decisions in my life have occurred after hearing certain songs on the radio and realizing that they are connecting with me a certain way.
For instance when I was driving to V.I. for an interview and still not sure if I wanted to take the job, I heard Papa Roach's "Last Resort." This struck me deep as if this job may be my last resort to save me from Smokey Bones. It didn't help that a few days before that while on my way to work at S.B. that I heard Korn's (stupid band name) "Falling Away"particulary the line "I can't always say, its going to be better tomorrow, life's falling away from me."
I know that I'm rather happy and content right now. How because the above mentioned songs don't ring the same way in my ears. They are great songs and I enjoy when they come on the radio, but they no longer seem to have that personal feeling. I was even able to shake the nagging this-applies-to-you-feeling from the "How can I love this, a life so dishonest, it made me compromise" line from "Save me" or "blasphemy" or whatever that song was called.
Now the song that appeals to me in a personal way is "Satisied" sung by the Brobginagian Bards. "And it'll be said that I died satisfied." Which is good, I guess. Not that I will have died, but that I will have died satisfied.
Oh and of course.... "LLama Llama Duck" always applies to me!

Fluids, Fluids, Everywhere: day at the plasma center

2006-04-30T21:37:00.000-07:00

The other day I went to donate plasma. It started out as an expected 3 hour wait to go through the entire process that includes a brief exam and urine test for the first visit. I expected this, so I pulled out my game boy advance, had a seat and started playing. It was a metroid game I borrowed from Justin. (yay justin)

I love Metroid games. They are lots of fun. So I'm playing Metroid in the waiting room about an hour passes but no worries. To make a boring waiting room visit short. I got called up, photographed, sent to the other waiting room, got my blood sample with the little pin prick. Then they tell me to give them a urine sample. With my little cup I head into the restroom. ****EDITTED FOR YOUR CONVIENCE****
I have a half full cup of urine. Oddly, I don't have a lid to seal it in. Now the man said to not flush or wash my hands till I give him the cup, then I may do so. ICKY ICKY I'm unclean. But I suck it up and open the door to hand him the cup. As I start to hand him the cup I see someone walking right between us. Doing the polite thing, I do not thrust the urine into her path. About that time the spring loaded door swings back and slams into my holding hand splashing the contents of the cup on the floor, on my hand, and perhaps even on my (soon to be washed) shirt. The man i was attempting to hand it too says "That's not good." I agree with a freaked out disgusted/horribly embarrassed look on my face, but I retreat to the restroom and begin to wipe up the floor with paper towels and scrub the top layer of skin off my hands in order to insure that I am clean. Questions I ask myself.
1) Why place the restroom in a high traffic area which this was (you'd understand if you saw it) if people are going to be running around with urine samples?
2) Why have the door be spring loaded to close behind you if people are going to have to stand in the entrance of the door to avoid splashing passers-by with human waste?
3) If you must have a spring loaded door for a bathroom in a high traffic area WHY IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS SANITARY DO YOU NOT INVEST IN TINY LIDS FOR YOUR CUPS OF URINE!!!

I get cleaned up, and apparently I pass all the tests because eventually I make my way to the plasma giving center. Now I am leaving out a very humorous and pleasant conversation with marlena (i think) the physician assistant who checked to make sure that I wasn't a druggie or a man of loose living. I also learned that you cannot give plasma if you are bi-polar. NEAT! I'm on the bed, needle in the arm and blood being taken from my body. This doesn't bother me, what is making me squirm is the movie they are playing. You may ask "Llama, why not use the gameboy?" 1) because it was now about 3 hours later at the start of the actual plasma removal and the batteries were about dead 2) I can't play metroid with one arm and the other arm was in no position to help me play.

Anyway, they are showing Aeon Flux. I know it was a great cartoon, but it made a horrid movie. It smelled of a bad matrix clone. I will admit that I found the "bad guys plot" to be very interesting and entertaining, but I could not get into the characters or have concern for the future of the human race which Aeon threated to put into jeopardy at one point. To be fair, I did miss the opening of the movie, but it just seemed mostly bland. I know a lot of the movie was supposed to just be hot women in skimpy outfits fighting, but even that didn't do much for me. Maybe its hard to get a blood flow to the penis when it is going out a tube from your arm?? I dunno.

My digust for this movie was so bad that when the nurse came to check on me, she asked if everything was okay, I said "no, your movie really sucks." She agreed with sympathy. The lass beside me agreed as well. Ah well, at least I didn't have to pay to see it. I do wonder if the cartoon was good.

Sorry I've been a bad little blogger, but I've gotten addicted to the Order of the Stick message boards and spend a lot of time on them lately. They have a great game called Stabbity Death where you simply inflict a stabbity death on the person who posted above you and explain why. Its simple, its silly, its a shame my friends forums don't have enough people to play.

grab a canoe

2006-04-18T08:12:00.000-07:00

Its a stream of thought process.

Today my cable was shut off. It will be sorely missed, especially since, thinking I wouldn't need it anymore, I gave the antenna back to Eric. On the plus side, this is one less bill to worry about.

I became a pixie in the playground today by stabbitying to death some poor guy named mikoto. I was stabbityed to death shortly thereafter as a proper welcome to the OOTS forum.

I have a new answering machine message.

I suppose that I'll finally get around to watching all those movies I have been wanting to watch lately now that the cable is gone, but what am I gonna watch before bed now that I don't have Adult Swim.

Oh well, tonight adult swim was committing a terrible heresy in my eyes. They were going to start showing Saved by the Bell at midnight tonight. I HATE Saved by the Bell. Its mostly the same damn jokes and it just promotes sickening stereo-types. Even worse, I hate it on CARTOON NETWORK. That network is really going downhill. First they start showing Dumb & Dumber on primetime and now SbtB? When you stray away from your gimmick as a TV station bad things happen. Ask Game Show Network how well its Reality Show about Chuck Woolery's life went. GGGAAAHHHH!! Who Framed Roger Rabbit is an exception to no-live-action on Cartoon Network because it is full of cartoon characters.

I find myself arm-chair GMing my own game the next day. I really should have had Aust make a save or have the Crystal Ball start to take over his mind as well. Oh well, I'm proud of having the succubus pop out of the crystal ball was a nice touch.

Okay, you can take off your life jackets now. I'm done with the random streaming. Time to make supper. Speaking of supper, Eric still owes me a snowcone.

Opening night movies

2006-04-14T12:09:00.000-07:00

There are 2 movies I want to see on opening night this year. Sorry, but X-men 3 isn't among them. Number 2 was great, and I love the character of Hank McCoy. He reminds me so much of everything I want to be. But I think the curse of the hype has bitten me already on that movie and I know it won't get any better. The hype that is. Anyway, I'm tangenting..
The first movie is Silent Hill. The movie plot looks very similar to the first video game, but instead of the father, its the mom looking for her daughter. I'm afraid that it will be Hollywoodized, but so far it looks good, as opposed to almost every other video game made movie. See also, Doom, Resident Evil. However, my love for the game series gives me faith.
The second movie is Snakes on a Plane starring Samuel L. Jackson as an F.B.I. member guarding a mafia informant on a flight to testify. An assassin turns loose a "slither" of snakes while on the flight. The movie title has garnered so much attention that it is the sole reason Samuel agreed to the part. In fact, whenever the company making it changed the title, it was quickly changed back. To learn more about the bizarre history of this bizarre film, visit www.wikipedia.com and search Snakes on a plane or www.snakesonablog.com This sounds just so odd that I have to see it. Greg Dean from Real Life is excited too apparently as S.o.a.P. recently made a reference in one of his comics.

GMing thoughts

2006-04-11T11:14:00.000-07:00

My group recently finished the major portion of their storyline that ended in an epic brutal involved combat with the villian. He was a 10th level Cleric with a Nightmare mount. Justin's character did die thanks to a Slay Living spell but he was quickly revived thanks to a cleric that did happen to be nearby. (No, seriously, he wasn't planted by me. He just worked out really nicely.) After a long battle, in which Justin did rejoin, the villian was slain and the party rejoiced.

It looks on paper that the battle was way too tough for them and I'll admit I was worried for awhile. Heck, even The Lord of Faerun "The Slayer of the Player" himself shot me a look like "dude, too much" when I told him of the encounter. But, I find that things at their challenge level aren't challenging to them. Adam was on a solo quest,he rolls a 100 on the random encounter chart. He encountered a spectral panther (MoF) CR 4. He was a level 5 barbarian. It was slain in 3 rounds and he had 1 scratch on him. GAH! Where's the challenge?? His sword wasn't ghost-touch, just +1. He should have at least had to think about raging...shouldn't he? So I have a hard time judging what to throw at them, and this was supposed to be the culimnation of a lot of work, the final showdown with the vile evil overlord and I couldn't take it if they just ran up and stabbed him for 2 rounds then he died. That's really not satisfying for all parties involved.

In all fairness, except for damage and AC and HP the Nightmare was nothing more than a horse. He didn't use his eatherialness or his flight and his flames were negated by his environment. As for the cleric, a lot of his nastier low level spells were targetted at the NPC healer. Blindness/Deafness and Hold Person were used to zap him instead of the PC's. Also, the PC's had a hound archon helping them out, at least until he rolled a 1 and threw up. (it made sense in the story). Overall, it was a hellacious fight with them thinking they were doomed throughout most of it, but with a sense of triumph and joy when he fell and Justin cut off his head. Its what it was supposed to be.

I don't like death effects. I may still use them, but it won't be as easy. I think that if I do use them in the future, be it by spell or gaze attack (bodak) or flashing her chest at the PC's (nymph), the victim will have to fail 2 saves or maybe i'll just alter it so the victim goes to -9 HP (no need to stabilize). Death should be feared in games, as such, it should not occur so easily as one lousy roll.

This is not to say that fate should not come down to a lousy roll. Things such as "if my character doesn't make his reflex save against this lightning bolt, I'll drop to -13" are okay because things have led up to drop his HP to such low numbers.

All that being said, I do really enjoy DMing for this group. Hell, we gamed on the fly from Midnight till 4 AM and general concensus was that it was one of my best sessions even though I was making up 2/3 of it on the fly. (I totally did not expect them to go to Celestia, but there they were and wanting to explore it and pursue their backstories.) One last thing, now that they are at 6th level, they both get 2 attacks per round and Adam is getting a cohort fighter too. Plus they have earned some loot lately. So now I wonder what I can do to possibly challenge them?

forwarded email

2006-04-04T14:02:00.000-07:00

I received a forward today about an NBC poll and religious beliefs. These always get me in trouble because I feel to need to respond to them with an alternative point of view. Here is the letter I got today.
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Do You Believe in God?
NBC this morning had a poll on this question. They had the highest number of responses that they have ever had for one of their polls, and the percentage was the same as this:
86% to keep the words, IN God We Trust and God in the Pledge of Allegiance14% against.
That is a pretty 'commanding' public response. I was asked to send this on if I agreed or delete if I didn't. Now it is your turn ... It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, I have a very hard time understanding why there is such a mess about having "In God We Trust" on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance. Why is the world catering to this 14%?>> AMEN! If you agree, pass this on, if not, simply delete. In God We Trust
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Here is my reply
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Dear {name removed}
I wouldn't worry about it. I don't see uscatering to the 14% anytime soon. That would alienate 86% of the voters and that's just not happening. But its interesting, the words "under God" were added to the pledge on June 14, 1954 while the original pledge was written in 1892. In fact, the major reason the words "under God" were added was to fight the fear of communism. David Greenberg says:

The legislative history of the 1954 act stated that the hope was to "acknowledge the dependence of our people and our Government upon … the Creator … [and]deny the atheistic and materialistic concept of communism. {I had the link here, to the article, but it didn't copy right}

Essentially those 2 words were added for political reasons. This upsets me. God should not be used as a political tool to fight the commies. I'm not proposing that you stop saying "under God" in the pledge. However, I would put forth the hypothesis that Christians should not make pledges of loyalty to anyone other than to God and to His church. After all, a Christian is called to be a man of his word and should the goals of the country ever seperate from the goals of God, and a Christian has pledged his loyalty to both, then he must break his word. Also, as mentioned earlier, the pledge of Allegiance attempted to manipulate God by forcing Him to fight the Reds. That doesn't sit well with me.

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Its not as well done as previous replies have been, but its not really a topic I have that much of a passion for. Ah well, I needed to write something on the blog.

owning emotion??

2006-03-31T12:26:00.000-08:00

Exclusive content:
Last night I had a dream that Steve kept ripping on me for something I did. I told him I really wasn't in the mood for it. He persisted his verbal jabs. Finally, I turned around and elbowed him in the face. Not hard, just enough to show with body language that I really wasn't in the state of mind to put up with it. All the emotional in this dream were very vivid and real. The anger at Steve, the self-loathing over my own stupidity.
The worst part was whenever I woke up, I was still filled with self-loathing and anger. The self-loathing went away when I realized that I hadn't actually done that since it was a dream and my dream had started after the incident occurred. However, the anger towards Steve was still there even up to when I saw him this morning. It was a low level rage, but how fucked up is the brain that it will want to react to emotions it knows is not real. I know Steve had not wronged me, I also know that Steve would not act in that manner. Fortunately, all remnants of rage dissapated during our discussion about GMing. (I know they couldn't stay around too long.) P.S. Damn, he can be a sneaky little bastard, but I wanna be able to GM like him.

Game on!

2006-03-27T14:46:00.000-08:00

I'm restarting my D&D game soon. Its suffered the loss of one of the 3 players, so its down to a 2 player game, but they both agreed to play it and they seem pretty excited.
I'm thrilled. Finally, the tale that I put a lot of time and effort into will be told or at least more of it will. I'm thrilled because we had one hell of a good time when we gamed before. I'm also thrilled that I have a hole to the outside world that I can share my odd little thoughts with. I enjoy the challenge of GMing. Whenever the players do something that totally throws me for a loop, (by makes good sense), or whenever I have to do some thinking to weave the plot together, or even to act out some characters, it all makes my brain feel so alive.
I'm nervous. We have 2 players. That can seriously skew things. They are both melee fighters, the druid moved away. Yikes, unfortunately, my brain doesn't think of what 2 players or what 2 melee fighters can do and the CR system is set for 4 PC's of varying talent. So its hard to judge a good encounter level for them. A minotaur, a CR 4, a decent normal encounter for a 4th level, is it now a boss encounter due to the fact i have only 2 players?? Or is it too much for them? It's in situations like that, that my inexperience concerns me. I don't wanna whack them (i have some interesting contengencies if I do :). Nor do I want them to have to flee, I wouldn't say my plot is railroad, but it doesn't have too many track switches at this point, and those switches are after "the bridge" that is next session, and if that bridge crumbles....um....well.....
They do have an NPC with them to act as a healer. A 3rd level cleric of Ehonna (that was originally supposed to be a cleric of Kord). That does alieviate (sp?) some of my fears, and creates an odd feeling of intrigue/curiosity/glee(?)/suspense for the future. But I can't say too much about that at this time. Security reasons and all. But mostly any concern I have is negated by the fact that they are a great group of gamers. They both have a great roleplaying attitude of wanting to A) see the story unfold and play the part of the characters as it does. B)have a good time with good laughs. C)both kill evil stuff and actually role-play as well.
We'll see how it turns out on Wednesday, i hope.

cornerstone

2006-03-27T09:15:00.000-08:00

This post is the cornerstone of a new blog that may die as so many internet phenomenons do, or it may grow.

First, a moment for the dead internet phenomenons before us. All your base are belong to us. Badger, Badger, Badger, Badger Badger.