Monday, February 19, 2007

Will power and religion

I wonder what's wrong with me. Presumably, nothing is wrong with me and I'm a perfectly normal man, but it seems odd to me.

Let's take a look at some of the teachings of the church
1) Help out those in need.
2) Don't wank.
These really have nothing in common, however, they are what I was taught growing up.

Now, see, here is where the confusing part appears.
1) Last night, at 2:45 AM, I was on the tail end of an 8 hour trip home from Ohio. I had to be up in 3 hours for work, so I was greatly looking forward to whatever time I could spend in Sandman's Realm. I was 300 feet from exit 36 when by the side of the road is a truck with someone waving their arms for attention. Against my own better judgment, and being genuinely afraid I was about to expose myself to someone who meant to wrong me, I pull off the side of the road and go see if he needs help. He was a local fellow who was returning home and thought he could make it to exit 36's shell station. So, I gave the fellow a ride to Shell, then to Citgo because Shell was closed, and finally to the Shell at exit 38 because the Citgo's pumps were on, but refused to relinquish their gas into his gas can. Since he only had 2 dollars, I pulled out my credit card and paid for his gas. He did give me the 2 dollars that he had. Then we drove back to his truck, I dropped him off, and went on my way home. When I got home, I felt the desire to masturbate before bed, because I was frustrated about the 9 and a half hour day I was about to have on only 3 hours of sleep. So, I did. Then I went to bed.

Now....here is what bothers me. I was willing to risk being robbed, beaten, car-jacked, killed, or worse, to help out a stranger because I believe it is what God would want me to do. I think it is what Jesus would do. However, I was not willing to tolerate the 2 minutes of sexual frustration I would have had before falling to sleep. It just seems weird to me that I'd be willing to do so much, but not willing to do so little. What's up with that?

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