owning emotion??
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Last night I had a dream that Steve kept ripping on me for something I did. I told him I really wasn't in the mood for it. He persisted his verbal jabs. Finally, I turned around and elbowed him in the face. Not hard, just enough to show with body language that I really wasn't in the state of mind to put up with it. All the emotional in this dream were very vivid and real. The anger at Steve, the self-loathing over my own stupidity.
The worst part was whenever I woke up, I was still filled with self-loathing and anger. The self-loathing went away when I realized that I hadn't actually done that since it was a dream and my dream had started after the incident occurred. However, the anger towards Steve was still there even up to when I saw him this morning. It was a low level rage, but how fucked up is the brain that it will want to react to emotions it knows is not real. I know Steve had not wronged me, I also know that Steve would not act in that manner. Fortunately, all remnants of rage dissapated during our discussion about GMing. (I know they couldn't stay around too long.) P.S. Damn, he can be a sneaky little bastard, but I wanna be able to GM like him.