Fluids, Fluids, Everywhere: day at the plasma center
The other day I went to donate plasma. It started out as an expected 3 hour wait to go through the entire process that includes a brief exam and urine test for the first visit. I expected this, so I pulled out my game boy advance, had a seat and started playing. It was a metroid game I borrowed from Justin. (yay justin)
I love Metroid games. They are lots of fun. So I'm playing Metroid in the waiting room about an hour passes but no worries. To make a boring waiting room visit short. I got called up, photographed, sent to the other waiting room, got my blood sample with the little pin prick. Then they tell me to give them a urine sample. With my little cup I head into the restroom. ****EDITTED FOR YOUR CONVIENCE****
I have a half full cup of urine. Oddly, I don't have a lid to seal it in. Now the man said to not flush or wash my hands till I give him the cup, then I may do so. ICKY ICKY I'm unclean. But I suck it up and open the door to hand him the cup. As I start to hand him the cup I see someone walking right between us. Doing the polite thing, I do not thrust the urine into her path. About that time the spring loaded door swings back and slams into my holding hand splashing the contents of the cup on the floor, on my hand, and perhaps even on my (soon to be washed) shirt. The man i was attempting to hand it too says "That's not good." I agree with a freaked out disgusted/horribly embarrassed look on my face, but I retreat to the restroom and begin to wipe up the floor with paper towels and scrub the top layer of skin off my hands in order to insure that I am clean. Questions I ask myself.
1) Why place the restroom in a high traffic area which this was (you'd understand if you saw it) if people are going to be running around with urine samples?
2) Why have the door be spring loaded to close behind you if people are going to have to stand in the entrance of the door to avoid splashing passers-by with human waste?
3) If you must have a spring loaded door for a bathroom in a high traffic area WHY IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS SANITARY DO YOU NOT INVEST IN TINY LIDS FOR YOUR CUPS OF URINE!!!
I get cleaned up, and apparently I pass all the tests because eventually I make my way to the plasma giving center. Now I am leaving out a very humorous and pleasant conversation with marlena (i think) the physician assistant who checked to make sure that I wasn't a druggie or a man of loose living. I also learned that you cannot give plasma if you are bi-polar. NEAT! I'm on the bed, needle in the arm and blood being taken from my body. This doesn't bother me, what is making me squirm is the movie they are playing. You may ask "Llama, why not use the gameboy?" 1) because it was now about 3 hours later at the start of the actual plasma removal and the batteries were about dead 2) I can't play metroid with one arm and the other arm was in no position to help me play.
Anyway, they are showing Aeon Flux. I know it was a great cartoon, but it made a horrid movie. It smelled of a bad matrix clone. I will admit that I found the "bad guys plot" to be very interesting and entertaining, but I could not get into the characters or have concern for the future of the human race which Aeon threated to put into jeopardy at one point. To be fair, I did miss the opening of the movie, but it just seemed mostly bland. I know a lot of the movie was supposed to just be hot women in skimpy outfits fighting, but even that didn't do much for me. Maybe its hard to get a blood flow to the penis when it is going out a tube from your arm?? I dunno.
My digust for this movie was so bad that when the nurse came to check on me, she asked if everything was okay, I said "no, your movie really sucks." She agreed with sympathy. The lass beside me agreed as well. Ah well, at least I didn't have to pay to see it. I do wonder if the cartoon was good.
Sorry I've been a bad little blogger, but I've gotten addicted to the Order of the Stick message boards and spend a lot of time on them lately. They have a great game called Stabbity Death where you simply inflict a stabbity death on the person who posted above you and explain why. Its simple, its silly, its a shame my friends forums don't have enough people to play.